Issue #17 - June 2005

IN THIS ISSUE
1) Upfront & Personal
2) New Referral Lottery
3) Feature Article: Self-contentment Leads to Confidence
4) Briefcase Moms® Home Study Program
5) The Balance Zone- Comments from South Africa
6) Out and About

This newsletter is a valuable resource I provide for my coaching clients and coaching groups. It is also available to those who requested it at my website www.briefcasemoms.com or workshops, purchased my book Briefcase Moms or have requested information about my coaching services.


Upfront & Personal

May was an extremely busy and productive month for me.  I've got lots to tell you about. 

I'm happy to announce the new and improved Briefcase Moms® website is up and running.  It now reflects my expansion into the corporate and organizational market as well as new services and products for working moms.   One thing I'd like you to pay particular attention to is the Briefcase Moms® Community.  Membership benefits include a subscription to this newsletter, invitations to the Success & Balance TeleForums (resuming in September) and access to the Resource Centre featuring $500 in complimentary downloads. As a current newsletter subscriber you are grandfathered in as a member. But you do need a user name and password to access the Resource Centre.  Your user name is:  joy  and your password is:  today.  Please post this information somewhere you'll be able to find it in the future.  I encourage you to take a look around the Resource Centre.  There are some fabulous coaching assessments, quizzes and programs available to you.

Well, I've joined the world of blogs. If you want to see my latest musings about kids, careers and choices check out my new blog posted on www.briefcasemoms.com.  I decided to create this blog as a way to respond to your questions and create a new forum for exchange on issues pertaining to working mother work-life balance issues.

I like to pay attention to the repetition of events showing up in my life.  For example, if three different people mention a certain book to  me in the space of a couple of weeks I take it as a sign I'm to read that book.  This past month the topic of confidence has shown up numerous times.  First, I was interviewed by Chatelaine.com for a piece being written on women and confidence (or lack of it) and then I had four subsequent conversations on the same topic with clients.  And, I've also been thinking about my own personal level of confidence lately as I venture out to do more and more speaking events. 

So, this month's article is about self-confidence...whether you've got it and how to get it.  Enjoy! L



Feature Article: Self-contentment Leads to Confidence
by Lisa Martin, PCC  

Being self-content means accepting and acknowledging who you are at your core and becoming satisfied -- maybe not perfect, but satisfied -- in all areas of your life.  When you learn to better understand, better appreciate and eventually love yourself, you exude a quiet confidence that will open doors to what you want in life.

One way to develop a strong sense of self-contentment is to give yourself the gift of self-appreciation.  Offer yourself the same respect and kindness you give to others you care deeply for.  In doing so, you will feel more at peace with yourself, be strong in your convictions and easily stand up for yourself.  Here are three ways to support you in becoming more confident.

1.  Silence Your Inner Critic

Many women have a tendency to focus on what is "wrong" about themselves rather than what is "right."  We tend to pick out and pick on the parts of ourselves we like the least. This disapproving inner critic (that little voice inside our head that points our faults and undermines our achievements) needs to be silenced. Instead of focusing on what you don't like about yourself, do your best to acknowledge and appreciate what makes you unique.  Your smile.  Your sense of humor. Your eyes.  Now go further.  What qualities define you as a person?  Resist the temptation to criticize yourself.  This is a learned behavior and it can be unlearned with intentional action.

2.  Surround Yourself with Positive Environments

In order to remain confident or regain confidence, you have to ensure that you surround yourself with positive environments – emotionally and physically. This means cultivating friendships that enrich your life.  A well-meaning friend that consistently points out your faults may be undermining your sense of self. Seek out people who care about you and can list all your lovely qualities instead. Fill your personal space with objects that inspire you, such as pictures of loved ones, keepsakes and favorite books.

3.  Acknowledge Your Achievements

Like most women, you may have been brought up not to be boastful.  However, there is a distinction between bragging and not recognizing your accomplishments and contributions.  We have all achieved things in our lives, both big and small, personally and professionally.  But oftentimes, we cross that achievement of our "to-do" list and quickly move to the next item, with little or no celebration.  When you give yourself permission to feel positive about your accomplishments and refuse to listen to your inner critic, you will feel pleased within yourself.  You will proudly share your wins, rather than apologize for them.  You might even amaze yourself when triumphal works such as "I am one awesome lawyer," "I am the best mother ever," or "I rock" roll off your tongue with hardly at thought.

Watch out universe, here you come!

To find out how confident you are go to Chatelaine.com and take their quiz.